.png)
.png)
Close
.svg){kind=icon}
There’s something about that first quiet sip of coffee in the morning — before the phone starts buzzing, before the inbox fills up — that invites reflection. It’s in that stillness that the truth of a moment hits you. For me, that moment came not long ago when I celebrated my 46th birthday.
Birthdays have a funny way of sneaking up on you. One day you’re 30, full of hustle and caffeine, and the next you’re in your mid-forties wondering where the time went and how you learned so much — sometimes the hard way. My birthday weekend was filled with simple joys: family, laughter, good food, and that rare pause where life slows down just enough to take inventory.
And as I sat with that cup of coffee, thinking about another year gone by, I realized how closely birthdays mirror the turning of a calendar year. Both are markers — little checkpoints that remind us to stop chasing for a moment and simply look around.
If I’m being honest, the last few years have brought more change than I ever expected.
Back in 2022, my world turned upside down. I went through a divorce, faced thyroid cancer, battled health challenges that tested every ounce of strength I had, and was laid off from a role I poured myself into. It was one of those seasons that strips you down — the kind where you’re forced to rebuild from the ground up and decide who you truly want to be on the other side.
Looking back, I see now that those moments were the foundation for everything that followed. They taught me resilience. They taught me grace. They reminded me that sometimes life pushes you out of your comfort zone not to punish you, but to push you toward something greater.
Then came 2025 — a year of renewal.
I left a role I felt deeply comfortable in, one that had become second nature, to take a leap into something entirely new: the world of AI-driven mortgage technology. It was exciting, challenging, and a reminder that growth often begins where comfort ends.
It was also the year I became a grandmother for the first time — an experience that instantly reframed my definition of time, purpose, and joy. I spent as much time as I could with that little girl, soaking in moments that reminded me what truly matters.
Between new beginnings, new adventures, and planning trips that reminded me to start living more — 2025 became a year that changed my perspective. It taught me that when you’re brave enough to step into the unknown, life rewards you with clarity, purpose, and a deeper sense of peace.
If there’s one word that sums up the past few years for me, it’s detour.
We all start out with a map — a sense of where we’re headed, what success should look like, how life and career are supposed to unfold. And then … life happens. The road closes, the path shifts, and suddenly you find yourself somewhere you never planned to be.
That’s what 2022 felt like for me — a major detour. Divorce, health battles, a layoff — those moments rerouted my life in ways I couldn’t have predicted. But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
Every detour I’ve taken — personal and professional — has brought me closer to clarity. It’s where I’ve learned the most about who I am, what I value, and how resilient I can be. And when 2025 came around with all its new beginnings — a new role, a new granddaughter, a new chapter of living fully — I finally understood that the detours were never setbacks. They were reroutes to something better.
When I look back at my
own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours —
I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge.
In mortgage and in life, we live in constant motion. The deadlines never end, the market never fully stabilizes, and there’s always a new initiative, integration, or project that demands attention. But here’s the thing — growth doesn’t happen only in motion. It happens in the pause.
That’s what I’ve learned at 46: to honor the pause. Reflection doesn’t slow you down; it grounds you. It gives you clarity to move forward with intention instead of reaction. And that’s a lesson I think our entire industry could benefit from.
When I look back at my own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours — I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge. Sometimes those pauses came from burnout. Other times, they came from opportunity. But they always led somewhere meaningful.
Balance isn’t a luxury — it’s survival. For years, I equated success with pace. The faster I worked, the more I produced, the more valuable I was. Sound familiar?
But the truth is, running at full speed with no recovery time doesn’t make you a leader; it makes you exhausted. And exhaustion blurs perspective.
Finding balance is not about perfect scheduling — it’s about boundaries and grace. It’s saying no when your plate is already full. It’s leaving space for yourself in between the meetings, the client calls, and the constant demands of the job.
At 46, balance looks different for me. It’s quiet mornings with coffee and my thoughts. It’s long walks that clear my head instead of long nights staring at a laptop. It’s learning that you can’t pour from an empty cup — and that sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is refill it.
The mortgage industry has changed more in the past five years than it did in the previous fifteen. AI, automation, new lending models, credit-union expansion, and a redefined borrower experience — growth is no longer a buzzword; it’s survival.
But here’s the catch: personal growth and professional growth are intertwined. You can’t show up for the evolving needs of your company or your clients if you’re not showing up for yourself.
Growth takes humility. It means being willing to unlearn old patterns, embrace new tools, and stay curious even when you’re the most experienced person in the room.
As women in mortgage, we’ve learned to adapt — sometimes faster than we’d like — and that’s a strength we don’t celebrate enough. We’ve learned to juggle home and work, nurture relationships, and lead teams through constant change. And we’ve done it while still making time to lift each other up. That’s growth in its purest form.
If there’s one truth that has stood the test of time, it’s this: relationships outlast results.
Technology will keep evolving. Companies will merge. Market conditions will shift. But the people we meet along the way — the ones who mentor us, challenge us, laugh with us through the chaos — they’re the real markers of success.
At 46, I value those relationships more deeply than ever. I think about the early mentors who saw potential before I saw it myself. The peers who became lifelong friends. The clients who turned into collaborators. Every connection, every conversation, has shaped my journey.
In a people-driven business like ours, we can never forget that trust is built one interaction at a time. Relationships are the roots that keep us grounded, no matter how many times the landscape shifts.
Now, as we step into 2026, that reflection from my birthday feels even more relevant. A new year always brings a mix of excitement and uncertainty. Will rates stabilize? Will technology outpace our capacity to adapt? Will we finally find that elusive “balance” between efficiency and human touch?
The truth is, we don’t know. But what we can control is how we show up for it.
This year, I’m choosing to show up differently — with more clarity, more empathy, and a greater focus on intention. I want to be more present in conversations, more curious in challenges, and more courageous in decisions.
And I hope our industry does the same.
Mortgage and home-equity lending are standing at a crossroads. We’re balancing innovation with regulation, automation with empathy, and data with trust. It’s not easy — but that’s exactly why reflection is so critical right now.
If we pause long enough to look inward, both as individuals and as organizations, we can make smarter, more human-centered decisions. We can identify what’s working, what isn’t, and where we need to evolve — not just for profitability, but for people.
But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
As I sip that first cup of coffee each morning, I try to ask myself one question: What kind of energy do I want to bring into today?
That simple question changes everything. It reminds me that mindset shapes momentum. And momentum shapes results.
So here’s my challenge to you as we step into 2026:
Take time this year to look inward. Don’t wait for burnout or a birthday to make you reflect. Create space to check in with yourself — your goals, your habits, your values.
Ask the hard questions:
What am I holding onto that no longer serves me?
How can I prepare for the challenges I know are coming — without losing myself in them?
How can I show up better — for my team, my clients, and my own peace of mind?
The truth is, challenges aren’t going away. Work will stay demanding. Markets will fluctuate. New technologies will keep reshaping how we operate. But how you handle those challenges — that’s where the growth happens.
If we learn to respond instead of react, to listen instead of rush, to pause instead of panic, we’ll not only lead better businesses — we’ll live better lives.
So here’s to another year — another cup of coffee, another opportunity to reflect, to grow, to connect.
Whether you’re 26 or 46, new to the industry or a seasoned veteran, we all have the same opportunity each morning: to begin again, with a little more grace, a little more wisdom, and a renewed sense of purpose.
Reflection fuels direction. And direction, when paired with intention, leads to growth that truly lasts.
So pour that first cup. Sit in the quiet for a moment. And remember — sometimes the most important work we do isn’t in the next meeting or email. It’s in the detours and pauses we take to reflect and realign before the day even begins.
Here’s to a 2026 filled with growth, gratitude, and the courage to face both the calm and the chaos with equal grace.
Ashley Gravano is a sales and growth leader in the mortgage technology space.
_55820d3d-f25b-4697-a290-63977fba2745.jpeg)
There’s something about that first quiet sip of coffee in the morning — before the phone starts buzzing, before the inbox fills up — that invites reflection. It’s in that stillness that the truth of a moment hits you. For me, that moment came not long ago when I celebrated my 46th birthday.
Birthdays have a funny way of sneaking up on you. One day you’re 30, full of hustle and caffeine, and the next you’re in your mid-forties wondering where the time went and how you learned so much — sometimes the hard way. My birthday weekend was filled with simple joys: family, laughter, good food, and that rare pause where life slows down just enough to take inventory.
And as I sat with that cup of coffee, thinking about another year gone by, I realized how closely birthdays mirror the turning of a calendar year. Both are markers — little checkpoints that remind us to stop chasing for a moment and simply look around.
If I’m being honest, the last few years have brought more change than I ever expected.
Back in 2022, my world turned upside down. I went through a divorce, faced thyroid cancer, battled health challenges that tested every ounce of strength I had, and was laid off from a role I poured myself into. It was one of those seasons that strips you down — the kind where you’re forced to rebuild from the ground up and decide who you truly want to be on the other side.
Looking back, I see now that those moments were the foundation for everything that followed. They taught me resilience. They taught me grace. They reminded me that sometimes life pushes you out of your comfort zone not to punish you, but to push you toward something greater.
Then came 2025 — a year of renewal.
I left a role I felt deeply comfortable in, one that had become second nature, to take a leap into something entirely new: the world of AI-driven mortgage technology. It was exciting, challenging, and a reminder that growth often begins where comfort ends.
It was also the year I became a grandmother for the first time — an experience that instantly reframed my definition of time, purpose, and joy. I spent as much time as I could with that little girl, soaking in moments that reminded me what truly matters.
Between new beginnings, new adventures, and planning trips that reminded me to start living more — 2025 became a year that changed my perspective. It taught me that when you’re brave enough to step into the unknown, life rewards you with clarity, purpose, and a deeper sense of peace.
If there’s one word that sums up the past few years for me, it’s detour.
We all start out with a map — a sense of where we’re headed, what success should look like, how life and career are supposed to unfold. And then … life happens. The road closes, the path shifts, and suddenly you find yourself somewhere you never planned to be.
That’s what 2022 felt like for me — a major detour. Divorce, health battles, a layoff — those moments rerouted my life in ways I couldn’t have predicted. But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
Every detour I’ve taken — personal and professional — has brought me closer to clarity. It’s where I’ve learned the most about who I am, what I value, and how resilient I can be. And when 2025 came around with all its new beginnings — a new role, a new granddaughter, a new chapter of living fully — I finally understood that the detours were never setbacks. They were reroutes to something better.
When I look back at my
own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours —
I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge.
In mortgage and in life, we live in constant motion. The deadlines never end, the market never fully stabilizes, and there’s always a new initiative, integration, or project that demands attention. But here’s the thing — growth doesn’t happen only in motion. It happens in the pause.
That’s what I’ve learned at 46: to honor the pause. Reflection doesn’t slow you down; it grounds you. It gives you clarity to move forward with intention instead of reaction. And that’s a lesson I think our entire industry could benefit from.
When I look back at my own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours — I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge. Sometimes those pauses came from burnout. Other times, they came from opportunity. But they always led somewhere meaningful.
Balance isn’t a luxury — it’s survival. For years, I equated success with pace. The faster I worked, the more I produced, the more valuable I was. Sound familiar?
But the truth is, running at full speed with no recovery time doesn’t make you a leader; it makes you exhausted. And exhaustion blurs perspective.
Finding balance is not about perfect scheduling — it’s about boundaries and grace. It’s saying no when your plate is already full. It’s leaving space for yourself in between the meetings, the client calls, and the constant demands of the job.
At 46, balance looks different for me. It’s quiet mornings with coffee and my thoughts. It’s long walks that clear my head instead of long nights staring at a laptop. It’s learning that you can’t pour from an empty cup — and that sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is refill it.
The mortgage industry has changed more in the past five years than it did in the previous fifteen. AI, automation, new lending models, credit-union expansion, and a redefined borrower experience — growth is no longer a buzzword; it’s survival.
But here’s the catch: personal growth and professional growth are intertwined. You can’t show up for the evolving needs of your company or your clients if you’re not showing up for yourself.
Growth takes humility. It means being willing to unlearn old patterns, embrace new tools, and stay curious even when you’re the most experienced person in the room.
As women in mortgage, we’ve learned to adapt — sometimes faster than we’d like — and that’s a strength we don’t celebrate enough. We’ve learned to juggle home and work, nurture relationships, and lead teams through constant change. And we’ve done it while still making time to lift each other up. That’s growth in its purest form.
If there’s one truth that has stood the test of time, it’s this: relationships outlast results.
Technology will keep evolving. Companies will merge. Market conditions will shift. But the people we meet along the way — the ones who mentor us, challenge us, laugh with us through the chaos — they’re the real markers of success.
At 46, I value those relationships more deeply than ever. I think about the early mentors who saw potential before I saw it myself. The peers who became lifelong friends. The clients who turned into collaborators. Every connection, every conversation, has shaped my journey.
In a people-driven business like ours, we can never forget that trust is built one interaction at a time. Relationships are the roots that keep us grounded, no matter how many times the landscape shifts.
Now, as we step into 2026, that reflection from my birthday feels even more relevant. A new year always brings a mix of excitement and uncertainty. Will rates stabilize? Will technology outpace our capacity to adapt? Will we finally find that elusive “balance” between efficiency and human touch?
The truth is, we don’t know. But what we can control is how we show up for it.
This year, I’m choosing to show up differently — with more clarity, more empathy, and a greater focus on intention. I want to be more present in conversations, more curious in challenges, and more courageous in decisions.
And I hope our industry does the same.
Mortgage and home-equity lending are standing at a crossroads. We’re balancing innovation with regulation, automation with empathy, and data with trust. It’s not easy — but that’s exactly why reflection is so critical right now.
If we pause long enough to look inward, both as individuals and as organizations, we can make smarter, more human-centered decisions. We can identify what’s working, what isn’t, and where we need to evolve — not just for profitability, but for people.
But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
As I sip that first cup of coffee each morning, I try to ask myself one question: What kind of energy do I want to bring into today?
That simple question changes everything. It reminds me that mindset shapes momentum. And momentum shapes results.
So here’s my challenge to you as we step into 2026:
Take time this year to look inward. Don’t wait for burnout or a birthday to make you reflect. Create space to check in with yourself — your goals, your habits, your values.
Ask the hard questions:
What am I holding onto that no longer serves me?
How can I prepare for the challenges I know are coming — without losing myself in them?
How can I show up better — for my team, my clients, and my own peace of mind?
The truth is, challenges aren’t going away. Work will stay demanding. Markets will fluctuate. New technologies will keep reshaping how we operate. But how you handle those challenges — that’s where the growth happens.
If we learn to respond instead of react, to listen instead of rush, to pause instead of panic, we’ll not only lead better businesses — we’ll live better lives.
So here’s to another year — another cup of coffee, another opportunity to reflect, to grow, to connect.
Whether you’re 26 or 46, new to the industry or a seasoned veteran, we all have the same opportunity each morning: to begin again, with a little more grace, a little more wisdom, and a renewed sense of purpose.
Reflection fuels direction. And direction, when paired with intention, leads to growth that truly lasts.
So pour that first cup. Sit in the quiet for a moment. And remember — sometimes the most important work we do isn’t in the next meeting or email. It’s in the detours and pauses we take to reflect and realign before the day even begins.
Here’s to a 2026 filled with growth, gratitude, and the courage to face both the calm and the chaos with equal grace.
Ashley Gravano is a sales and growth leader in the mortgage technology space.
There’s something about that first quiet sip of coffee in the morning — before the phone starts buzzing, before the inbox fills up — that invites reflection. It’s in that stillness that the truth of a moment hits you. For me, that moment came not long ago when I celebrated my 46th birthday.
Birthdays have a funny way of sneaking up on you. One day you’re 30, full of hustle and caffeine, and the next you’re in your mid-forties wondering where the time went and how you learned so much — sometimes the hard way. My birthday weekend was filled with simple joys: family, laughter, good food, and that rare pause where life slows down just enough to take inventory.
And as I sat with that cup of coffee, thinking about another year gone by, I realized how closely birthdays mirror the turning of a calendar year. Both are markers — little checkpoints that remind us to stop chasing for a moment and simply look around.
If I’m being honest, the last few years have brought more change than I ever expected.
Back in 2022, my world turned upside down. I went through a divorce, faced thyroid cancer, battled health challenges that tested every ounce of strength I had, and was laid off from a role I poured myself into. It was one of those seasons that strips you down — the kind where you’re forced to rebuild from the ground up and decide who you truly want to be on the other side.
Looking back, I see now that those moments were the foundation for everything that followed. They taught me resilience. They taught me grace. They reminded me that sometimes life pushes you out of your comfort zone not to punish you, but to push you toward something greater.
Then came 2025 — a year of renewal.
I left a role I felt deeply comfortable in, one that had become second nature, to take a leap into something entirely new: the world of AI-driven mortgage technology. It was exciting, challenging, and a reminder that growth often begins where comfort ends.
It was also the year I became a grandmother for the first time — an experience that instantly reframed my definition of time, purpose, and joy. I spent as much time as I could with that little girl, soaking in moments that reminded me what truly matters.
Between new beginnings, new adventures, and planning trips that reminded me to start living more — 2025 became a year that changed my perspective. It taught me that when you’re brave enough to step into the unknown, life rewards you with clarity, purpose, and a deeper sense of peace.
If there’s one word that sums up the past few years for me, it’s detour.
We all start out with a map — a sense of where we’re headed, what success should look like, how life and career are supposed to unfold. And then … life happens. The road closes, the path shifts, and suddenly you find yourself somewhere you never planned to be.
That’s what 2022 felt like for me — a major detour. Divorce, health battles, a layoff — those moments rerouted my life in ways I couldn’t have predicted. But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
Every detour I’ve taken — personal and professional — has brought me closer to clarity. It’s where I’ve learned the most about who I am, what I value, and how resilient I can be. And when 2025 came around with all its new beginnings — a new role, a new granddaughter, a new chapter of living fully — I finally understood that the detours were never setbacks. They were reroutes to something better.
When I look back at my
own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours —
I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge.
In mortgage and in life, we live in constant motion. The deadlines never end, the market never fully stabilizes, and there’s always a new initiative, integration, or project that demands attention. But here’s the thing — growth doesn’t happen only in motion. It happens in the pause.
That’s what I’ve learned at 46: to honor the pause. Reflection doesn’t slow you down; it grounds you. It gives you clarity to move forward with intention instead of reaction. And that’s a lesson I think our entire industry could benefit from.
When I look back at my own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours — I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge. Sometimes those pauses came from burnout. Other times, they came from opportunity. But they always led somewhere meaningful.
Balance isn’t a luxury — it’s survival. For years, I equated success with pace. The faster I worked, the more I produced, the more valuable I was. Sound familiar?
But the truth is, running at full speed with no recovery time doesn’t make you a leader; it makes you exhausted. And exhaustion blurs perspective.
Finding balance is not about perfect scheduling — it’s about boundaries and grace. It’s saying no when your plate is already full. It’s leaving space for yourself in between the meetings, the client calls, and the constant demands of the job.
At 46, balance looks different for me. It’s quiet mornings with coffee and my thoughts. It’s long walks that clear my head instead of long nights staring at a laptop. It’s learning that you can’t pour from an empty cup — and that sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is refill it.
The mortgage industry has changed more in the past five years than it did in the previous fifteen. AI, automation, new lending models, credit-union expansion, and a redefined borrower experience — growth is no longer a buzzword; it’s survival.
But here’s the catch: personal growth and professional growth are intertwined. You can’t show up for the evolving needs of your company or your clients if you’re not showing up for yourself.
Growth takes humility. It means being willing to unlearn old patterns, embrace new tools, and stay curious even when you’re the most experienced person in the room.
As women in mortgage, we’ve learned to adapt — sometimes faster than we’d like — and that’s a strength we don’t celebrate enough. We’ve learned to juggle home and work, nurture relationships, and lead teams through constant change. And we’ve done it while still making time to lift each other up. That’s growth in its purest form.
If there’s one truth that has stood the test of time, it’s this: relationships outlast results.
Technology will keep evolving. Companies will merge. Market conditions will shift. But the people we meet along the way — the ones who mentor us, challenge us, laugh with us through the chaos — they’re the real markers of success.
At 46, I value those relationships more deeply than ever. I think about the early mentors who saw potential before I saw it myself. The peers who became lifelong friends. The clients who turned into collaborators. Every connection, every conversation, has shaped my journey.
In a people-driven business like ours, we can never forget that trust is built one interaction at a time. Relationships are the roots that keep us grounded, no matter how many times the landscape shifts.
Now, as we step into 2026, that reflection from my birthday feels even more relevant. A new year always brings a mix of excitement and uncertainty. Will rates stabilize? Will technology outpace our capacity to adapt? Will we finally find that elusive “balance” between efficiency and human touch?
The truth is, we don’t know. But what we can control is how we show up for it.
This year, I’m choosing to show up differently — with more clarity, more empathy, and a greater focus on intention. I want to be more present in conversations, more curious in challenges, and more courageous in decisions.
And I hope our industry does the same.
Mortgage and home-equity lending are standing at a crossroads. We’re balancing innovation with regulation, automation with empathy, and data with trust. It’s not easy — but that’s exactly why reflection is so critical right now.
If we pause long enough to look inward, both as individuals and as organizations, we can make smarter, more human-centered decisions. We can identify what’s working, what isn’t, and where we need to evolve — not just for profitability, but for people.
But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
As I sip that first cup of coffee each morning, I try to ask myself one question: What kind of energy do I want to bring into today?
That simple question changes everything. It reminds me that mindset shapes momentum. And momentum shapes results.
So here’s my challenge to you as we step into 2026:
Take time this year to look inward. Don’t wait for burnout or a birthday to make you reflect. Create space to check in with yourself — your goals, your habits, your values.
Ask the hard questions:
What am I holding onto that no longer serves me?
How can I prepare for the challenges I know are coming — without losing myself in them?
How can I show up better — for my team, my clients, and my own peace of mind?
The truth is, challenges aren’t going away. Work will stay demanding. Markets will fluctuate. New technologies will keep reshaping how we operate. But how you handle those challenges — that’s where the growth happens.
If we learn to respond instead of react, to listen instead of rush, to pause instead of panic, we’ll not only lead better businesses — we’ll live better lives.
So here’s to another year — another cup of coffee, another opportunity to reflect, to grow, to connect.
Whether you’re 26 or 46, new to the industry or a seasoned veteran, we all have the same opportunity each morning: to begin again, with a little more grace, a little more wisdom, and a renewed sense of purpose.
Reflection fuels direction. And direction, when paired with intention, leads to growth that truly lasts.
So pour that first cup. Sit in the quiet for a moment. And remember — sometimes the most important work we do isn’t in the next meeting or email. It’s in the detours and pauses we take to reflect and realign before the day even begins.
Here’s to a 2026 filled with growth, gratitude, and the courage to face both the calm and the chaos with equal grace.
Ashley Gravano is a sales and growth leader in the mortgage technology space.
There’s something about that first quiet sip of coffee in the morning — before the phone starts buzzing, before the inbox fills up — that invites reflection. It’s in that stillness that the truth of a moment hits you. For me, that moment came not long ago when I celebrated my 46th birthday.
Birthdays have a funny way of sneaking up on you. One day you’re 30, full of hustle and caffeine, and the next you’re in your mid-forties wondering where the time went and how you learned so much — sometimes the hard way. My birthday weekend was filled with simple joys: family, laughter, good food, and that rare pause where life slows down just enough to take inventory.
And as I sat with that cup of coffee, thinking about another year gone by, I realized how closely birthdays mirror the turning of a calendar year. Both are markers — little checkpoints that remind us to stop chasing for a moment and simply look around.
If I’m being honest, the last few years have brought more change than I ever expected.
Back in 2022, my world turned upside down. I went through a divorce, faced thyroid cancer, battled health challenges that tested every ounce of strength I had, and was laid off from a role I poured myself into. It was one of those seasons that strips you down — the kind where you’re forced to rebuild from the ground up and decide who you truly want to be on the other side.
Looking back, I see now that those moments were the foundation for everything that followed. They taught me resilience. They taught me grace. They reminded me that sometimes life pushes you out of your comfort zone not to punish you, but to push you toward something greater.
Then came 2025 — a year of renewal.
I left a role I felt deeply comfortable in, one that had become second nature, to take a leap into something entirely new: the world of AI-driven mortgage technology. It was exciting, challenging, and a reminder that growth often begins where comfort ends.
It was also the year I became a grandmother for the first time — an experience that instantly reframed my definition of time, purpose, and joy. I spent as much time as I could with that little girl, soaking in moments that reminded me what truly matters.
Between new beginnings, new adventures, and planning trips that reminded me to start living more — 2025 became a year that changed my perspective. It taught me that when you’re brave enough to step into the unknown, life rewards you with clarity, purpose, and a deeper sense of peace.
If there’s one word that sums up the past few years for me, it’s detour.
We all start out with a map — a sense of where we’re headed, what success should look like, how life and career are supposed to unfold. And then … life happens. The road closes, the path shifts, and suddenly you find yourself somewhere you never planned to be.
That’s what 2022 felt like for me — a major detour. Divorce, health battles, a layoff — those moments rerouted my life in ways I couldn’t have predicted. But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
Every detour I’ve taken — personal and professional — has brought me closer to clarity. It’s where I’ve learned the most about who I am, what I value, and how resilient I can be. And when 2025 came around with all its new beginnings — a new role, a new granddaughter, a new chapter of living fully — I finally understood that the detours were never setbacks. They were reroutes to something better.
When I look back at my
own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours —
I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge.
In mortgage and in life, we live in constant motion. The deadlines never end, the market never fully stabilizes, and there’s always a new initiative, integration, or project that demands attention. But here’s the thing — growth doesn’t happen only in motion. It happens in the pause.
That’s what I’ve learned at 46: to honor the pause. Reflection doesn’t slow you down; it grounds you. It gives you clarity to move forward with intention instead of reaction. And that’s a lesson I think our entire industry could benefit from.
When I look back at my own career — the chapters, the pivots, the detours — I can see how every pause, even the uncomfortable ones, created space for something better to emerge. Sometimes those pauses came from burnout. Other times, they came from opportunity. But they always led somewhere meaningful.
Balance isn’t a luxury — it’s survival. For years, I equated success with pace. The faster I worked, the more I produced, the more valuable I was. Sound familiar?
But the truth is, running at full speed with no recovery time doesn’t make you a leader; it makes you exhausted. And exhaustion blurs perspective.
Finding balance is not about perfect scheduling — it’s about boundaries and grace. It’s saying no when your plate is already full. It’s leaving space for yourself in between the meetings, the client calls, and the constant demands of the job.
At 46, balance looks different for me. It’s quiet mornings with coffee and my thoughts. It’s long walks that clear my head instead of long nights staring at a laptop. It’s learning that you can’t pour from an empty cup — and that sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is refill it.
The mortgage industry has changed more in the past five years than it did in the previous fifteen. AI, automation, new lending models, credit-union expansion, and a redefined borrower experience — growth is no longer a buzzword; it’s survival.
But here’s the catch: personal growth and professional growth are intertwined. You can’t show up for the evolving needs of your company or your clients if you’re not showing up for yourself.
Growth takes humility. It means being willing to unlearn old patterns, embrace new tools, and stay curious even when you’re the most experienced person in the room.
As women in mortgage, we’ve learned to adapt — sometimes faster than we’d like — and that’s a strength we don’t celebrate enough. We’ve learned to juggle home and work, nurture relationships, and lead teams through constant change. And we’ve done it while still making time to lift each other up. That’s growth in its purest form.
If there’s one truth that has stood the test of time, it’s this: relationships outlast results.
Technology will keep evolving. Companies will merge. Market conditions will shift. But the people we meet along the way — the ones who mentor us, challenge us, laugh with us through the chaos — they’re the real markers of success.
At 46, I value those relationships more deeply than ever. I think about the early mentors who saw potential before I saw it myself. The peers who became lifelong friends. The clients who turned into collaborators. Every connection, every conversation, has shaped my journey.
In a people-driven business like ours, we can never forget that trust is built one interaction at a time. Relationships are the roots that keep us grounded, no matter how many times the landscape shifts.
Now, as we step into 2026, that reflection from my birthday feels even more relevant. A new year always brings a mix of excitement and uncertainty. Will rates stabilize? Will technology outpace our capacity to adapt? Will we finally find that elusive “balance” between efficiency and human touch?
The truth is, we don’t know. But what we can control is how we show up for it.
This year, I’m choosing to show up differently — with more clarity, more empathy, and a greater focus on intention. I want to be more present in conversations, more curious in challenges, and more courageous in decisions.
And I hope our industry does the same.
Mortgage and home-equity lending are standing at a crossroads. We’re balancing innovation with regulation, automation with empathy, and data with trust. It’s not easy — but that’s exactly why reflection is so critical right now.
If we pause long enough to look inward, both as individuals and as organizations, we can make smarter, more human-centered decisions. We can identify what’s working, what isn’t, and where we need to evolve — not just for profitability, but for people.
But here’s the thing about detours: they don’t erase your destination. They just change your direction.
As I sip that first cup of coffee each morning, I try to ask myself one question: What kind of energy do I want to bring into today?
That simple question changes everything. It reminds me that mindset shapes momentum. And momentum shapes results.
So here’s my challenge to you as we step into 2026:
Take time this year to look inward. Don’t wait for burnout or a birthday to make you reflect. Create space to check in with yourself — your goals, your habits, your values.
Ask the hard questions:
What am I holding onto that no longer serves me?
How can I prepare for the challenges I know are coming — without losing myself in them?
How can I show up better — for my team, my clients, and my own peace of mind?
The truth is, challenges aren’t going away. Work will stay demanding. Markets will fluctuate. New technologies will keep reshaping how we operate. But how you handle those challenges — that’s where the growth happens.
If we learn to respond instead of react, to listen instead of rush, to pause instead of panic, we’ll not only lead better businesses — we’ll live better lives.
So here’s to another year — another cup of coffee, another opportunity to reflect, to grow, to connect.
Whether you’re 26 or 46, new to the industry or a seasoned veteran, we all have the same opportunity each morning: to begin again, with a little more grace, a little more wisdom, and a renewed sense of purpose.
Reflection fuels direction. And direction, when paired with intention, leads to growth that truly lasts.
So pour that first cup. Sit in the quiet for a moment. And remember — sometimes the most important work we do isn’t in the next meeting or email. It’s in the detours and pauses we take to reflect and realign before the day even begins.
Here’s to a 2026 filled with growth, gratitude, and the courage to face both the calm and the chaos with equal grace.
Ashley Gravano is a sales and growth leader in the mortgage technology space.
.jpg)
MaxClass is a woman-owned company, and we're offering MWLC members 65% off your continuing education when you use our code WOMENWIN.
MaxClass is a woman-owned company, and we're offering MWLC members 65% off your continuing education. Become a member for our unique code.
The unexpected turns that led Mae Mackey to the industry
Why humanity is the most valuable currency in mortgage lending
Three women leaders on why curiosity, courage, and raising your hand matter more than checking every box
How resilience, adaptability, and voice powered Elizabeth Mix’s rise in mortgage banking
Strong brands don’t just differentiate — they mentor, inspire, and transform the future of mortgage
The industry keeps repeating old mistakes. Here’s how lenders can pivot, prepare, and protect profitability
A surprisingly powerful break from the chaos of grown-up life.
From Charmed to the mortgage industry
A letter from the editor
MaxClass is a woman-owned company, and we're offering MWLC members 65% off your continuing education when you use our code WOMENWIN.
MaxClass is a woman-owned company, and we're offering MWLC members 65% off your continuing education. Become a member for our unique code.
.png)
.jpg)
Build self-assurance, project confidence in any setting, and communicate with authority without second-guessing yourself
How mortgage women can achieve Non-QM mastery
One woman’s solution for achieving work/life harmony
How veteran mortgage professionals are thriving in a changing industry
Protecting the consumer’s personal data is becoming more important than ever
.jpg)
.png)
.png)
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Suspendisse varius enim in eros elementum tristique. Duis cursus, mi quis viverra ornare, eros dolor interdum nulla, ut commodo diam libero vitae erat. Aenean faucibus nibh et justo cursus id rutrum lorem imperdiet. Nunc ut sem vitae risus tristique posuere.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Suspendisse varius enim in eros elementum tristique. Duis cursus, mi quis viverra ornare, eros dolor interdum nulla, ut commodo diam libero vitae erat. Aenean faucibus nibh et justo cursus id rutrum lorem imperdiet. Nunc ut sem vitae risus tristique posuere.